My lunch tasted like sad.
A couple years ago I went through a pretty bad breakup. And by “pretty bad” I mean I spent the better part of 2007 walking around feeling like a shell of a human being. The only thing I could eat without wanting to immediately hurl was plain oatmeal mixed with a pinch of splenda. I ate so much oatmeal at the beginning of that breakup that I got pretty sick of it and switched to boxes of cookies and gallons of ice cream after a couple months. I'm better now, obv, but how bullshit is this...
I had plain oatmeal for the first time in over a year today and this awful sense of sadness overcame me with the first bite. It tasted just like my breakup! How rude is it that this dumper dude 1) made me cry and 2) ruined a great snack? I'm pissed.
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